KSAT Newsletter Volume V

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KSAT Newsletter Volume V

Post  Lessifer on Tue Jun 05, 2012 5:50 am

Written By.....Rage
Gray with Articles from Finn, Rasmusan, Sagepupil, Arwen, Diablo, Mourgana,
Furyo, SlitherHunter, Lessifer, Lilbopeep

At A Glance

Good morning\evening all!! Im sorry this is
coming to you so late. This has been a very interesting and exciting week for
all I'm sure, We have the update insanity, a sunday horde (who woulda thunk
that??) more new members, real life going nuts with summer starting and kids
out of school, as well as a fond farewell (maybe? Hopefully not) to one of our
own. This issue I'm bringing a special feature in called “name that face” in
which all of you can guess which face belongs to which member. This time I
didn't get very many BUT, Im hoping to do it again in another issue, so those
who haven't submitted a photo heres your chance! Once again one & all Be
good, Be safe and as always

Tip of the Week

The only thing worse than running out of ammo
during a zombie horde is being on the toilet during an attack.

Video Vault

Must-see movies that are coming out soon:

***Snow White and The Huntsman***


(anyone who loves TrueBlood will
love this its got Alexander Skarsgard!!)

***Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter***

(For the Kids)

***Madagascar 3***


Widow Books

ok a few must reads that have
gotten good, bad and mixed reviews:

-->Warm Bodies-Isaac Marion

-->Fifty Shades-E.L. James

-->Under a Vampire Moon-Lynsay


Why did the zombie lose the lawsuit?

He had no leg to stand on!

(definitions to tickle your funny bone)

Bobbing apples-leaving your bra off to run

Boogieman-guy picking his nose at

Survival Guide

This weeks guide:

GUNS (Top 5 For ZA)

---->1. Glock 17

---->2. Marlin 1894 CB

---->3. AR 15

---->4. Smith and Wesson 59

---->5. HK USP


Boogieman-guy picking his nose at a red light

Full moon-Repairman (need I say more?)

Is a drunken ghost a methylated spirit?

How do you know a zombie is tired?

He's dead on his feet.


In sports news San Antonio has had a massive upset with OKC leading
the series 3-2, Spurs lost last nights game OKC 108-Spurs 103.

In the Eastern Conference BOS and

MIA are tied 2-2.

Although I'm hoping that OKC wins it (not because Im a fan AT ALL, I
don't watch basketball) as to the eastern conference it looks like either
team could win it.


Madness takes its toll. Please
have exact change.

Some mornings, it's just not worth
chewing through the leather straps

May the forces of evil become
confused on the way to your house

Don't worry about temptation--as
you grow older, it starts avoiding you.

For three days after death, hair
and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.


Capricorn:Dec 22-Jan 19)

Today is the day you lock your windows and doors, it looks like its
raining hordes today

Aquarius: (Jan 20-Feb 18)

Theres travel in your
future, just avoid speeding buses and whack-a-mole, you might get a hidden

Pisces: (Feb 19-March 20)

Avoid dancing Zombies,
there aren't the lords of the dance they say they are.

Aries: (march 21-april 19)

Your secret has been found
out and the meryl streep movies hidden under your bed will be your greatest
weakness today.

Taurus: (april 20-may 20)

You will wake up tomorrow,
kill stuff, work, and go back to sleep....wow sucks to be you..

Gemini: (May 21-June 21)

Avoid beans
today....actually everyday, explosive flatualance will alert the zombies to
where you are. Don't believe the warnings, you cannot kill zombies with gas....


Cancer: (June 22-July 22)

you'll be distracted by a
kid with a roll of duct tape in his nose, avoid intersections, also avoid
kids with tape in thier nose...

Leo: (July 23-Aug 22

the photocopier is your
mortal enemy, its not you its it and it will not help you in your race to
become #1 zombie slayer...why would it?

Virgo: (Aug 23-September

expect unusual suprises
today, such as the stalker chick impaling zombies on your front porch

Libra:(Sept.23-Oct. 23)

try to laugh a bit more,
not all apocalypes are bad, at least you have friends...mostly, the ones who
ARENT Zombies....

Scorpio: (Oct 23-Nov 21)

Today is the day you work
on your self-esteem...and avoid open windows

Saggitarius: (Nov 22-Dec

The cheerleaders in high
school that laughed behind your back are now zombies, guess its time to get
even now huh?

As The Zombie Lay

Last Week: “Well, I could tell you what
happened and why I hate that mofo.....but that would require a story, they
easiest thing to say is.......

“I hate him, we're enemies and that's the end of that.” Before Les,
Cotto, Slvr,and Snow knew what hit them, Zeke stormed out of the control

“What was THAT?” Snow asked everyone
curious as to why Zeke reacted that way.

“Its better if you knew the whole story,”
a voice from the doorway said. “Im Doc, Zeke and I are best friends, family
even, we've been close for a long time, one thing you should know is that
Zeke not only HATES Dr Fail, but has a good reason to.See, about 3 years ago
when this whole thing started, Zeke, Dr. Fail and myself were working
together doing research on the side. Zeke has this brilliant idea about using
computer technology mixed with genetics to provide a cure. I was handling the
medical side of it, Zeke was working with the computers to code the nana's
and Dr Fail was doing the genetics. We were still in the research phase when
Dr Fail decided to go ahead with a human trial, and Zeke wasn't very happy
about it. You see, Dr Fail didn't care about curing ANYTHING, he just wanted
the props, so much so that he rushed things too quickly, and the nanos werent
ready. It ended up with very disastorous results. His creations are some of
the really terrible monsters that are out there right now. When he first
created these.....things...Zeke and I tried to contain them, But they turned
on us faster then we could even try to contain them. They also spread, they
have hyper senses that make them attach to a specific scent. Because Zeke and
I were there when they were created they are able to track us. Zeke and I
finally were able to escape from the facility and hide, but we found that
those things were able to track us and everytime they get close they make
communicating with anything or anyone impossible. We still haven't figured
out what Dr Fail did to them, Zeke has almost come up with a way to get
around them, but ….well you see why he hates Dr. Fail now....He's not the
saving grace he says he is. I'm assuming he's also usning these wolves as a
guinea pig trial for some type of army.”

“Whoa, well.....hmmm does mom know?” Snow

“She does, but don't mention it to her,
she would like to rip a new one into Dr Fail as well, she tangled with one of
the first really bad creations, a devourer....”

“Omg those things are UGLY!!”

“Yeah, she got a lot of licks in, but not
before it threw her across the room and busted her up pretty bad, matter of
fact it tore up her knee so bad that she still has a limp, you don't hardly
see it, but if you watch her you might...”

“Well, either which way, we have a herd
of wolves on the other side of our security fence and the generator won't
hold for much longer until someone goes out back and fixes the line, its
still inside the fence, so as long as it holds we won't have a problem,
question is, who's going to go look for Zeke so we can get this done...” Less
said looking up from the control panel.” We have three hours before we're
overrun by zombie, mutated, whatever they are werewolves.....”

With a loud screech the control panel
went crazy.

“What was that?” Cotto asked, all five of
them looking at the security camera. As they stared in shock......

Well guys what is it going to be? This
week instead of me coming up with ideas....I'd like suggestions, email me
with your ideas as to how the next chapter should play out.....



Strawberry Scones


1 cup ripe strawberries - cleaned,
hulled and diced

1 teaspoon vanilla extract1/2 cup
light cream2 cups all-purpose flour1/3 cup white sugar

1 tablespoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1 1/2 teaspoons lemon zest

6 tablespoons cold unsalted butter


Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220
degrees C). Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Place diced
strawberries on paper towels to absorb liquid. Combine the cream with the
vanilla extract in a small pitcher, and set aside. Whisk the flour, sugar,
baking powder, salt, nutmeg, and lemon zest together in a mixing bowl. Cut
the cold butter into chunks and add to the flour mixture. Use a pastry
blender to cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse, pea-sized crumbs.
Stir in strawberries, and gently toss ingredients. Make a hole in the middle
of the flour mixture; pour cream mixture into the hole. Quickly stir dough
together until just blended. Allow dough to rest 2 minutes. Turn dough out
onto a lightly floured work surface; and knead until smooth and satiny, 4 to
5 minutes. Transfer dough to prepared baking sheet and pat into an 8-inch
round. Use a serrated knife to cut the round into 8 wedge-shaped pieces.
Separate wedges on the baking sheet, leaving at least 1/2 inch space between

Bake in preheated oven until tops
are light brown and crusty, 16 to 18 minutes. Transfer to a wire rack, and
cool 20 minutes before serving.

Lunch: (veg)

Veggie Burger (cheesecake factory)


3 small beets, peeled and chopped
(222 grams)

1/2 cup green lentils

1/2 cup bulgur wheat

1/3 cup raw cashews

1 cup mushrooms

1/2 cup minced yellow onion

1 tsp fresh thyme

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp pepper

1 tbsp + 1 tsp canola oil, divided

2 cups water, divided

pepperjack cheese for serving


Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place
the chopped beets on a lined baking sheet and roast for 20 minutes until
tender. Remove and set aside.While the beets are roasting, combine the lentils
with 1 1/2 cups water in a small pot on the stove. Bring to a boil, then
reduce heat and simmer for 30 minutes until lentils are tender.Also on the
stove, bring 1/2 cup water to a boil. Add the bulgur then turn off the heat
and cover for 10 minutes. The bulgur should absorb all of the liquid and be
tender when done.Heat one tsp oil in a large skillet over medium high heat.
Add minced onion, mushrooms and thyme and cook for about 6 minutes. Both
onions and mushrooms should be softened. When you have all of your
ingredients prepped and ready, start making your burgers! Place raw cashews
in either a food processor or Vita-Mix and process until they become a flour.
Then, add beets, bulgur, onions, mushrooms and rosemary and process until
combined. Add cooked lentils and
continue processing until everything has combined but still on the “chunky”
side. Remove mixture from either food processor or blender and place in a
large bowl.Heat up the remaining tablespoon of oil over high heat. Divide
mixture into six veggie burger patties and carefully cook each side for about
5 minutes, until golden and crispy.Serve veggie burgers on whole wheat rolls
with lettuce, tomato, cheese and sweet chili sauce!


Cajun Stuffed Peppers


6 large green bell peppers

3 tablespoons olive oil

1 onion, diced2 cloves garlic,
minced1/2 teaspoon dried oregano

1 tablespoon Creole seasoning

black pepper to taste3/4 pound
shrimp, peeled and deveined

1 1/2 links of andouille sausage,

1 cup uncooked long-grain white rice

2 1/2 cups chicken broth

1 (8 ounce) can tomato sauce

1 lemon - cut into wedges, for
garnish (optional)

Louisiana-style hot sauce


Preheat oven to 325 degrees F (165
degrees C). Grease an 8x12 inch baking dish. Bring a large pot of water to a
boil. Remove tops and seeds from peppers. Blanch in boiling water 3 minutes.
Drain on paper towels. Heat olive oil in a large, deep skillet over medium
heat. Saute onion until translucent. Stir in garlic, and season with oregano,
Creole seasoning and black pepper. Stir in shrimp and sausage, and cook until
shrimp turns pink, 5 minutes. Stir in rice, and cook 1 minute. Pour in
chicken broth and tomato sauce. Cook until thick, 15 to 20 minutes. Fill
peppers with stuffing mixture, and place in baking dish. Bake in preheated
oven for 15 to 20 minutes, or until heated through. Serve with lemon wedges
and hot sauce.

(For the Vegan Version)

Use a vegetarian sausage and red
bell pepper instead of the shrimp and andouille, add a tsp more cayanne and
it'll taste exactly the same as the non-veg version

And Welcomes

Kudos goes out to all the members who have been working on raising
their scores this week, we're really pround of you. Also would like to
welcome the following members to the safe house

Rydemhard Lv 36

SagePupil Lv 40

LilBopeep Lv 25

RodneyBear Lv 39

Pyrothia Lv 31


ok all wanted to apologize again for this weeks paper being late,
being a crazy week and hopefully thigns will start getting back on track. In
the next issue look for more games, more suprises and something new im about
to cook up. For the moment enjoy this weeks game below. Be good, Be safe and


Posts : 40
Join date : 2012-03-25

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